Posted By sharon on November 14, 2011

The Buddha found that craving in all its many forms is the root of our suffering, dissatisfaction, and distress.  This element of the Dharma is a basic foundation of Buddhism.  The teachings are about how to recognize and understand our tendency toward craving (the First Noble Truth) and how to bring an end to this cause of our suffering.

To crave: to long for eagerly; to ask earnestly for; deep longing.

Volumes have been written on this topic, going back to the original Suttas (Buddhist scriptures).  Modern translations from western and eastern teachers continue to come forth.  The significance of craving on our lives is a deep and profound truth to grasp.

I am not a Buddhist scholar.  I am a student, a practitioner, and a meditation teacher.  Many of the teachers I have studied with have helped me in my quest for both an intellectual understanding of the significance of the Second Noble Truth, and an experiential knowing of it.

When we crave something, one of our six sense fields (eyes, ears, nose, tongue, skin, and mind) either craves more of what is pleasant, or for an end to what is unpleasant. We deeply long for things to be different than they are right now.

While I do not encourage the development of the mental state of craving, if you must crave – please try “longing deeply” to feel more compassion for yourself and others.  If you have a thought or feeling of wanting more kindness, patience, or understanding in your world, eagerly and earnestly give expression to these as you go about your day.

On the surface the practice of developing more kindness or compassion may appear as a form of craving, since we genuinely want to feel these wholesome qualities more and suffer less, but in practice bringing kindness and compassion to ourselves and others is taking the action required to end our suffering – the direction of the Third Noble Truth.  In time, kindness and compassion become our path (Fourth Noble Truth).

 

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Posted By sharon on October 31, 2011

Do you find yourself wanting more from something or someone than is actually there?

When the chocolate bar ends, the desire for just one more delicious bite….

Checking through your emails or bookmarks one more time for new messages that aren’t there….

Wanting your partner or friend to acknowledge the little extra, thoughtful things you did to make their day a bit nicer….

Buddhism reminds us that desires are endless.  We can certainly see this clearly by just watching what the mind does when there is some down time, when nothing much is happening.

We seek change – always wanting something more, something different than what is present right now.

This endless desire for something different blinds us to the richness of this moment – as it is — and fosters a low level of dissatisfaction with ourselves and others.

Try slowing down a bit — take a pause before you speak or bite into your food or get into your car.  Look around.  What do you see, what thoughts and moods are present right now, how does your body feel?

Appreciating this moment just as it is right now is a moment of deep peace.

May you enjoy many moments of peace this day.

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Posted By sharon on August 21, 2011

the mind that has known the activity of youth must now rest with the natural dignity of aging

the mind that seeks change from how things are now is leaning into an imaginary future that does not exist in this moment

the mind that seeks change is blind to the aliveness of this moment – it is all around us

feel the pulse of the earth

the pull of the moon

the sweep of the wind

knowing both sound and silence

the preciousness of each breath changing

life becomes subtle and simple and beautiful in that simplicity

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted By sharon on May 13, 2011

Trusting the Heart

The physical heart is often used as a metaphor for the feeling center of our emotions.  Sad emotions have their familiar heart sayings:  It broke my heart – I have a heavy heart – My heart is crying.

Common expressions for happy emotions related to the heart are also well known:  My heart is bursting with joy – My heart is filled with love – My heart is so happy.

Mindfulness helps us to be aware of the fluctuating moods and feelings that occur for all of us in response to life events.  The following original poem was prompted by the beautiful mindfulness practice of Loving Kindness which is a call to bring forth kindness whether we are feeling sad or happy.  Take to Heart the messages of each line and see how your body, mind and heart feel.

I see myself as my heart sees me.

I know myself as my heart knows me.

I accept myself as my heart accepts me.

I appreciate myself as my heart appreciates me.

I love myself as my heart loves me.

Treating the emotional heart with kindness is also good for the physical heart.  Trust your heart of goodness to care about yourself, and to take that caring into your friendships.

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Posted By sharon on March 4, 2011

When we think of sitting quietly with ourselves, disengaging for a short time from our worldly responsibilities, we may find our habit of always doing something pushing us to do the next thing.  Do you have a critical voice inside that says you are wasting time when you sit and reflect on your life or just relax for awhile?  Sooner or later, the body rebels out of exhaustion or by getting sick, the mind becomes clouded with internal messages telling us to do more, do it faster, do it better, and our emotions become reactive.

Giving the mind and body respite from always doing brings us back to a healthy balance of well-being.  I’m referring to sitting and being quiet with yourself–no television, radio, reading, eating, iPod, or other engagement.  I find people are often uncomfortable doing this practice at first because it is so unfamiliar.

Remember as a child how you laid on the grass and watched the clouds pass by, feeling the warmth of the sun, and the sensations of the earth on your back?

Poets have written for ages about “Time Well Spent”.  They know its value in life.  In our fast-paced lifestyles of today, this nurturing way of being is falling by the wayside.  But all it takes to bring it into your life is doing it–today.  Take some time to be with yourself quietly and see if you think it is a wise use of time.

 

 

 

 

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Posted By sharon on December 3, 2010

Adopt-a-Person

with a moment of kindness

Dedicate your day to Adopting a Person – or people as you see, meet, pass them.  Here’s a simple way to bring more happiness into your life and into the world.

Become a vehicle for kindness and friendliness as you go about your normal daily activities.  Bring people back into the family of humanity by acknowledging their presence.  Spread kindness one person at a time and notice how you feel.  It may be a silent moment inside of you that warms your heart or it may involve an actual interaction with another person.

Some of the ways to Adopt a Person:

Smile at someone                                      Say “Thank you”

Hold a door open for someone               Say “Hello”

Look someone in the eye with warmth and friendliness

Wave and smile at a stranger

See with warm, kind eyes as you walk through a market place or drive your car

If someone speaks to you, pause and really listen

Give someone else the parking spot

Introduce yourself to someone you don’t know

Compliment someone on how they look or something they did

Make someone feel seen or heard

Find your own creative way to send gestures of kindness and good will

First do this with people that are easy for you to feel natural kindness and friendliness toward – even strangers.  Don’t forget to include those closest to you.

Then go the extra mile and do it with people that are difficult – pause and find one thing about them that you can appreciate or respect and let that be the catalyst for returning to an inner feeling of kindness for that person—even if you don’t speak to him or her.

You might even want to keep track of how many people you Adopt in a day.  But be sure to notice how you feel when you do this simple practice of the heart.  You may notice you are more aware of others and less absorbed in your own stories for awhile.

Also be sure to notice how others respond to you, whether you speak to them or not.  Your inner and outer presence will convey to them your intention to be kind and friendly.

This is something you have to try for yourself.  You can’t just think about it.  You have to put it into action to know the results.

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Posted By sharon on November 6, 2010

We make things so complicated.

That which is right before us is actually quite simple.

We are blind — We don’t see beyond our ideas.

We are deaf — we don’t hear with the ear of true hearing.

We like our thoughts, our perceptions, our beliefs.  Even in their transient nature, we give them our full blessing.

Can we simple be with that which never changes?

The awareness behind the experience.

See directly the clear space the images come from.

Hear the silence out of which sounds arises.

Smell the purity of the odors that arise and pass.

Taste the flavors as they are.

Feel the physical response to life without interfering with the natural sensations.

Be the fullness of life itself — vibrant, dynamic, ever-changing.

Be like the rushing river cascading over the boulders, not picking and choosing which ones to polish and touch.

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Posted By sharon on July 15, 2010

Here are three simple words to help you through your day:

CALM – STRONG – AWARE

The next time your mind wants to be scattered or frantic about something, take a few deep breaths and say these words to yourself.  Notice carefully what happens when you not only say them, but feel the intention of each word’s meaning.

CALM

When we are calm physically, there is a greater chance for the mind to be calm.  Sometimes it is the body that gives us our first clue that we are reacting to something from an unhealthy, unskillful, or unwholesome place.  Pay attention to your body.  Get to know its wisdom.  Let it be your friend.  If it’s in a reactive mode, do this three-part practice.  Then allow the mind to calm down.  You may find a more creative and surprising option for handling whatever it is that is presenting this opportunity to practice mindful awareness.

STRONG

True strength comes from within us.  It’s choosing where we let our thoughts and intentions go and what we believe about ourselves and our capability.  Have you noticed how some thoughts we have about our ability seem to be misguided?  Here is a good meditation exercise:  set an intention that you aspire to do for some period of time today.  Your intention may be to dedicate 15 or 20 minutes to any project you have been putting off.  (Meditation for example?)  Stay with the intention regardless of any mental distractions or reasons to put it off.  Don’t let the whimsical mind win.  This is how you build inner strength.  It’s called follow-through.  You can begin your time of doing the intended act by saying the three-word practice above and enjoy the victory of developing a strong mind.

AWARE

Awareness is the element that makes a difference in how our lives are going.  If I have awareness of my physical and mental state, the choices I make through my speech and actions have a greater chance of producing goodwill rather than ill will–for myself and those I interact with.  A useful exercise to do regularly is to ask yourself: “Am I aware of what I’m doing, feeling and thinking right now?”  Over time, the awareness is there without the need to ask. This exercise enables us to see mental and physical tendencies that we wish to change and to develop new ways of being that enable us to be calm, strong and aware throughout our lives.

Artwork by Sid Seidenstein

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Posted By sharon on April 29, 2010

In the spring there are numerous media features suggesting different ways to renew, refresh, revitalize and/or restore ourselves to beauty, to health, to new energy.  Purification remedies and diets, visits to the spa, recommitting to an exercise program, planting new things in the garden, are just a few of the many suggestions for reconnecting with growth.

What is this flurry of information suggesting to people?  Is it just a seasonal think to entice consumers to get out there and spend?  I think it is mirroring to us what is a natural rhythm and feeling we get as humans when the winter thaw has melted and we begin to feel the shift in the air and see the changes in nature around us.

A pair of morning doves has returned to our yard to prepare a nest.  The squirrels are running back and forth in the early morning hours to find new treasures to hide for later consumption.  The roses have burst open virtually overnight.  Trees are beginning to get their cloak of leaves.  There is a different quality, a different texture to the environment—and we welcome it.  Our bodies, minds and spirits are lifted by such natural changes.  They are signs of new possibilities.  They symbolize new hope in a warmer, brighter, gentler tomorrow.

One of the ways we can fully appreciate this feeling of renewal is to take time to enjoy the clouds, the flowers, the aliveness in people and in nature.  I encourage people to take time to sit in a comfortable place in nature and look, see, hear and feel life around you without needing to change or correct anything about it.  Even letting go of the need to label what is experienced is freeing.  We can feel the connection inside of being part of the beauty of the changing landscape of life.  This kind of felt experience requires no analysis.  We only have to be aware and receptive to it.  Notice if making eye contact with the clerk in the market or smiling at a stranger on the street sparks a connection inside of being part of the human landscape.  You may notice that your body, mind and heart feel a little happier and lighter because of these simple practices.

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Posted By sharon on December 18, 2009

Loving Kindness is a basic teaching in most of the major religions of the world.  In Buddhism, Loving Kindness is a way for us to move from a “me” centered perspective to paying attention to another, or others.  Being able to be present with another person’s pain–whether emotional, physical or spiritual–requires us to be open to life itself.  This may bring a feeling of vulnerability which makes us uncomfortable.  This is a good sign that you are moving closer to your caring heart.

Loving Kindness is not something that someone instills in us.  It is the natural feeling of caring that is innate in us.  If we are always rushing around going from one project to another, we lose touch with that part of us that can sit with someone who needs to be heard, or even to feel compassion for ourselves.

Giving Loving Kindness to someone can take many forms–a smile to a stranger, calling a friend you haven’t seen for a long time, giving yourself some quality time with a loved one, listening to another person’s problems, or sitting peacefully in meditation and sending the intention to that person that they be happy.  Some people find great joy in tending a garden with care or taking care of homeless pets.  Whatever your chosen expression is for Loving Kindness, notice how you feel when you are giving it.  It is a gift that continues to grow in you and the other.

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